How to Attract Women

Co-authored by Eddy Baller

Last Updated: July 26, 2024 References

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Though it's impossible to have every woman in the world want you, there are many things you can do to improve your chances of appealing to as many women as possible. If you want to know how to catch the eye of a particular woman, check out How to Attract a Woman. If you want to know how to appeal to a variety of women, look no further.

Things You Should Know

Be confident and make an effort to improve yourself. Show interest in your lady’s life and learn to make her laugh. Dating and relationship coach Mark Rosenfeld says to “take care of your physical appearance” and “make strong eye contact.”

Method 1

Method 1 of 3:

Be Comfortable with Yourself

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1
Be confident in who you are. The first step to getting women to like you is to like yourself. If you're not happy with who you are, then the woman across the room is likely to not be impressed, either. Here are some ways to gain confidence in who you are:
- Be aware of your best attributes, whether it's your sense of humor or ability to make anyone open up. Emphasize them whenever you meet someone new.
- Work to address your flaws. Nobody's perfect, but you can become a better person by making a concerted effort to improve yourself.
- Confidence is key, but if you're too pleased with yourself, you may come off looking arrogant, and that is a big turn-off.^{[1]
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- Learn to make fun of yourself. Without being self-deprecating, making the occasional joke about yourself will show that you don't take yourself too seriously.
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Be comfortable with how you look. You don't have to be a body builder to have a healthy body and to be happy with how you look. If you're not self-conscious about your body, you won't be a chick magnet. Here are some ways to improve the way you feel about how you look:
- Be brave and take a dance or power yoga class. Not only will you improve the way you look, but you'll definitely meet some ladies in the process.
- Hitting up the gym a few times a week can improve your cardio, your muscle tone, and your self-esteem. If you prefer to skip the gym, you can even build muscles naturally by adjusting your diet and through strength training at home.
- Eat healthy foods. Eat three balanced meals a day and eat as many fruits and vegetables as you can. Avoid anything processed or fatty as much as you can, but splurge on the foods you really want once in a while.^{[2]
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- Dress well. Take time to wear well-fitting pants, clean shirts, and shoes that match your outfits. Making the effort to look nice will show the ladies that you're likely to make effort in other parts of your life, too.^{[3]
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Love what you do. If you want to attract ladies, you should already be happy with not only who you are and how you look, but with how you spend most of your time. If you're unhappy with your job or studies, it'll show, and the ladies will be put off by your negative attitude.^{[4]
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Research source} Here's how to do it:
- If you're working, try to love your job as much as possible by building a relationship with your coworkers, appreciating the perks of your work, and trying to do the best job you can so you feel good about yourself.
- If you're in school, focus on the subjects that you love most so the ladies will see that there is something you're passionate about. You'll be a better student, will gain more knowledge, and will come off looking like a more interesting person.
- Take up hobbies that improve your life. If you don't have many hobbies already, pick something to be passionate about, such as running, reading historical non-fiction, or building furniture. As long as you don't spend all of your time obsessing about your hobbies, you will not only be more appealing to women, but will become a better person in the process of pursuing your interests.
- Let's face it---you may be in a place in your life where you don't like what you do very much. Work to change that, and in the meantime, try to keep your complaining to a minimum so the ladies don't think you're a pessimist.

Method 2

Method 2 of 3:

Be a Dynamic Person

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1
Be cultured. Women will be attracted to you if you're a man of the world and are able to see things outside of your perspective. If you work to be more cultured, not only will you be more attractive to women, but you'll have a more informed outlook on life. Here's how to do it:
- Learn a new language. You'll be able to appreciate a new culture, and if you become fluent in a sexy language like Italian or French, the ladies will be impressed and excited to hear you flatter them in a foreign tongue.
- Read a wide variety of books. Reading fiction and non-fiction by a range of authors can help you appreciate how big the world is, and may give you topics to discuss with the ladies.
- Travel if you can. See the world, or at least your part of the country. You will learn a lot about the world and will meet a variety of interesting people, some of whom could be sexy ladies.
- Watch a variety of films. Watching both classics and current films can help you appreciate the complexity of the human existence. Your love for movies will also allow you to impress women with your insight when you invite them on movie dates.
- Open your eyes to a variety of cuisine. Don't just stick to pizza and pasta--try the new Korean or Burmese place in your neighborhood. This will also help you find a great date destination.
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Develop many healthy and exciting relationships. If you have a great relationship with your family and an eclectic group of friends, the ladies will want to be a part of your life. Women are wary of a guy without friends or a close relationship with any of his relatives, because this may indicate that he doesn't know how to get along with people, or doesn't find meaning in friendships. Here's how to work on the relationships in your life:
- Make a point of seeing or talking to your family members as much as possible. How you treat your family---especially your mother---says a lot about you, and ladies will be attracted to you if you're a doting son. You don't want to look like a momma's boy, but casually showing the ladies how much you love your mother will show them that you're a caring person.
- Develop an eclectic group of friends. While being best friends with everyone in your fraternity or at your cool new workplace can be a lot of fun, having a diverse group of friends can make you a more interesting person. It's great to be friends with a few guys from your fraternity, but if you've also developed relationships with your friends in your weekend soccer league, you may learn more about the world. What's more, the ladies will be attracted to your ability to be able to get along with a variety of people.
- Throw any dead weight off your friend-ship. If you're hanging out with a person who is rude or unpleasant just because you've been friends for years, it may be time to reevaluate the friendship. Besides, if you bring around someone who is deeply annoying or rude, the ladies will think this is a reflection of who you are.
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Pick up some useful skills. If you're not only interesting to be around but actually have a lot of knowledge, the ladies will be attracted to your manliness and your ability to get things done. Here are some examples:
- Learn how to cook. Start by adding just a few simple items to your repertoire. Once you perfect something, like the perfect steak or glazed salmon, you can invite the ladies over for dinner. You'll look sexy with a chef's apron on, whether you're behind a grill or in front of a stove.
- Learn how to be useful around the house. Whether you know how to fix a leak or a broken table, the ladies will be turned on by your know how and may even ask you for help.
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Develop a sense of humor. You may be interesting and cultured, but if you won't go far if you don't know how to make a lady laugh. If you have the right sense of humor, you will be much more likely to attract the ladies.^{[5]
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Research source} Here's how to do it:
- Be clever. You don't have to be the loudest or most outgoing person in the room, but if you make a cutting or sharp comment at the right time, the ladies will be impressed.
- Have the right delivery. If you have a funny comment, make sure you say it loudly enough and when no one else is talking. If you have to repeat your joke, it won't be funny anymore.
- Be appropriate. Make the right jokes for the right people. If you're hanging out with your best bro-friends, your jokes should be more raunchy than they are in front of a new group of girls, and especially if you're meeting a new lover's parents for the first time.

Method 3

Method 3 of 3:

Make a Woman Feel Special

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1
Don't be afraid to compliment a woman. You don't have to overdo it, but the right compliment at the right time can make a woman attracted to your honesty and ability to put yourself out there. Here's how to do it:^{[6]
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Expert Source

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach

Expert Interview. 7 February 2020.}
- When you first meet a girl, tell her you like a piece of her jewelry, her haircut, or one of her other accessories.
- Once you get to know her, you can be more blunt. Say, "Has anyone ever told you that you have very expressive eyes?" Or, "You have the sweetest laugh." Don't be afraid to make her blush just a little bit.
- Notice things about her personality. Really listen to what she says, and tell her that she sounds like a great friend, or that she has a great sense of humor.
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Show an interest in your lady's life. Your lady will be impressed by your interests and perspective, but you have to make sure to reciprocate by showing an interest in her pursuits as well. Here's how to show that you care:
- Remember things she's told you. If you've met her before and bring up small details from your previous conversation, such as the name of her sister or the place where she studied abroad, she'll be attracted to how much you care.
- Ask the right questions. Without sounding like you're heading an interrogation, you can ask her questions to get her perspective. Start small and ask for her opinion on topics that aren't very controversial, and once you get to know her better, you can dig deeper and ask about her perspective on balancing work and friends, or what she's looking for in a relationship.
- Tease her. Once you know her well enough to know her foibles, don't be afraid to poke fun at her, as long as she goes along with it.
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Be a thoughtful date. Once the woman is attracted enough to go on a date with you, you want to keep her interested by continuing to be engaged on your dates.^{[7]
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Research source} Here's how to let her know you care once you take her out:
- Be a gentleman. Open doors, get her flowers, and give her your coat if she's cold.
- Do the little things. Send her messages during the week to show that you're thinking of her. Get her small gifts.
- Tell her you had a great time. Be honest. If you had an amazing time, let her know so you can see her again.
- Once you're more comfortable, find some ways to get closer by brushing up against her. Become an expert on how to Touch a Girl.
- Reader Poll: We asked 176 wikiHow readers and 47% of them agreed that the characteristic they value most in a potential partner is a thoughtful and caring nature. [Take Poll]

Attract Girls and Win Their Hearts with this Expert Series

Attracting girls and turning them on doesn't have to be hard. Learn how with these expert articles, hand-picked from our dating coaches and relationship experts.

1

Show a Girl You Like Her

2

Be the Guy Every Girl Wants

3

Create Sexual Tension

Know a Girl's Feelings

Expert Q&A

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Question

How can I feel more comfortable around women?

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach
Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada. Coaching since 2011, Eddy specializes in confidence building, advanced social skills, and relationships. Conquer and Win helps men worldwide have the love lives they deserve. His work has been featured in The Art of Manliness, LifeHack, and POF among others.

Eddy Baller

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

You have to just get out there and have experiences with women. Go have conversations with women, like the barista at the coffee shop or the woman working the checkout line when you're getting your groceries. Any chance you have to start a conversation is a good opportunity to build up your social skills and start developing your character.

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Question

How do I strike up a conversation with a woman?

Eddy Baller
Dating Coach
Eddy Baller is a Dating Coach and the Owner of a dating consulting and coaching service, Conquer and Win, based in Vancouver, Canada. Coaching since 2011, Eddy specializes in confidence building, advanced social skills, and relationships. Conquer and Win helps men worldwide have the love lives they deserve. His work has been featured in The Art of Manliness, LifeHack, and POF among others.

Eddy Baller

Dating Coach

Expert Answer

You can start conversations by making very simple observations, like the simplest things you can imagine. For example, if you're standing at the crosswalk and it's raining, you could just turn to them and say, "I wish I brought my umbrella." There are endless scenarios like that where you can make a very simple, obvious comment, and a lot of those turn into conversations, and a lot of them don't. Sometimes you'll just get an acknowledgment and the person will smile at you. But that can still be a confidence booster.

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Don't be disappointed if you've tried everything and still can't attract the lady you want. In the process of becoming more attractive to women, you've improved yourself!

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